Related:

• Now... Sit! I said, Sit! [Santa's Little Helper walks away] Um, take a walk.
  Sniff that other dog's butt. See? He does exactly what I tell him....
• SMILEY :--) Jamie Farr (Klinger from M*A*S*H)
• Bart: [in the barber shop, getting a shave] Digital audio tape, my butt!
  When <I> was a kid, we had compact disks, and &l...
• Marge: I don't think it's a good idea to humiliate your boss on his birthday.
  Lisa: Actually, Mom, a tweaking of Mr. Burns' foibles if done with the greatest of care could earn Dad a special place in the old man's heart....
• Honey, if you shave my face I'll never forgive you for it!
• Could I come near your beauty with my nails, I 'd set my ten commandments in your face.
  -- William Shakespeare (1564-1616), King Henry VI -- Act i, Sc. 3...
• I had a brand-new Mercury. I loaned it to my brother last week.
  I said, "Treat it as if it was your own." He sold it. -- Jimmy Edmondson (Professor Backwards)...
• I thought you said that your dog does not bite! -- It's not my dog.
• I See Your Face Printed On My Money