Related:

• Do you think the service station could sell me Midnight Oil?
  Well no, but they did sell me ice Then to the Optometrist for R....
• MALOUF, DAVID (1934-) Australian novelist, academic, and someone who my father bores me shitless by talking about all the time.
  You've got cold you say? Well you know, Malouf said that influenza is like a bond between man and the unquestionable questions of existence....
• SCHEMA What you call a diagram when it gets too complicated and impressive to be called a diagram.
  -- Daniel Bowen's TOXIC CUSTARPEDIA...
• REFERENCE The academic way of copying what someone else has written.
  The best references don't actually exist. Which means they can say precisely what you want them to say....
• Jay: Two to two. Well, Homer, it all comes down to you.
  Homer: "Football in the Groin". "Football in the Groin"!...
• RETURN An experience of sheer terror. Here's some advice for when you want to return goods to their place of purchase.
  - When you get to the shop, radiate confidence. For some reason, whenever I'm in this situation I get pangs of guilt going through my mind....
• VARNISH What you promise yourself you'll do to that unfinished furniture you have bought.
  And still haven't done twenty years later when it begins to fall apart....
• GENERATION, OLDER The people that don't understand you. -- Daniel Bowen's TOXIC CUSTARPEDIA
• GENERATION, YOUNGER The people that you don't understand. -- Daniel Bowen's TOXIC CUSTARPEDIA