Related:

• People come up to me and say, "Emo, do people really come up to you?" -- Emo Phillip
• If women call you a Jock, can you call them a napkin?
• Women. You can't live with them, and sheep can't cook.
• You can always get the truth from an American statesman after he has turned seventy, or given up all hope of the presidency.
  -- Wendell Phillip...
• Typical humans, you can always count on them to mess things up.
• Women's creed: Men are like linoleum. If you lay them right the first time, you can walk on them for 20 years.
• I discovered my wife in bed with another man, and I was crushed.
  So I said, "Get off me, you two!" -- Emo Phillip...
• Four-wheel-drive just means you can get stuck in even more inaccessible places. -- Phillips' Law
• Arguing with a person's faith is like chasing them around a big empty parking lot.
  You can keep backing them up, and backing them up--but you never actually corner them....