Related:

• The more keys you have, the more likely you are to be locked out. -- Joe's Law of Key
• You can't unlock the keys.
• You may be redneck... if you prefer car keys to Q-tips.
• The telephone will ring when you are outside the door, fumbling for your keys.
• Turkeys aren't those funny grey keys you know
• Marge: Hey! Wh-what's going on?! [Fat Tony walks to the car, and tries to take the keys -- but they won't come off] Tony
  Is, uh, there a button or a release for these keys?...
• Jargon Coiner (#1) An irregular feature that aims to give you advance warning of new jargon that we've just made up.
  * WINCURSE: Loud expletive uttered when a Linux user comes face-to-face with a computer containing a WinModem....
• Blackheart: All right, I'll be back in the morning to pick up Stampy.
  Homer: Here's the keys. Blackheart: Elephants don't have keys....
• Abe: Ah, I guess Burns is finally gonna be rich. Ba
  Not without the keys, he isn't! [shows Abe the two keys] [long pause] Abe...