Related:

• That wife of mine is a liar," said the angry husband to a sympathetic pal seated next to him in a bar.
  "How do you know?" the friend asked. "She didn't come home last night, and when I asked her where she'd been she said she'd spent the night with her sister Shirley....
• A Betazoid woman, when she goes through this phase, quadruples her sex drive.
  "Or more." Or more? You never told me that. "I didn't want to frighten you....
• I fail to understand how a five-foot android with heuristic learning systems and the strength of ten men can be called a child.
  You've never been a parent. -- Picard and Troi, "The Offspring", stardate 43657.0...
• I tucked my heart away, I didn't need it, I didn't want it.
  At the negotiating table...it can be fatal to have a heart....
• A man arrived home early to find his wife in the arms of his best friend, who swore how much they were in love.
  To quiet the enraged husband, the lover suggested, "Friends shouldn't fight, let's play gin rummy....
• Listen, Tyrone, you don't know how dangerous that stuff is.
  Suppose someday you just plug in and go away and never come back?...
• I was in bed one night when my boyfriend Ernie said, "How come you never tell me when you're having an orgasm?
  I said to him, "Ernie, you're never around." -- Bette Midle...
• Hello Lal. How are you? Troi...Admiral...Admiral...
  An Admiral from Starfleet has come to take me away....
• When I come upon anything-- in Logic or in any other hard subject-- that entirely puzzles me, I find it a capital plan to talk it over, aloud, even when I am all alone.
  One can explain things so clearly to one's self! And then, you know, one is so patient with one's self...