-- How many
Christians
-- does it take to change a light bulb?
200!!! 100 to sit in church and pray long sonorous prayers for it
to see the light again, 10 to stand on street corners and point out
to others how that if they don't accept what they're being told,
their light might go out as well, 3 to try and exorcise the demon of
darkness out of the light bulb, 2 to gather together in
"the name of the lord" because where two or more are gathered together
in "his" name....., 10 to write to the alt.satanism newsgroup
to inform them that one of their own lights is having trouble
paying the electric bill (as if that'll convince us all to change
our beliefs), 74 to try and convince it to publicly "admit" its sins
so the lord can make it bright again, and 1 true idiot telling the
light bulb that if it really wants to be saved that all it has to do
is accept some paper god and pledge it 10 percent of its income and
at least 1 day a week of time and at least insult and generally bug
5+ people a day recounting how "I used to be a satanist" (no, really
- gasp) and now I've found the light. Yes, do all of this - and the
light will just, by the will of god, come back on - unless god is just
"testing" the light bulb, then it may stay dark forever.
How many
rec.humor readers
-- does it take to change a light bulb?
100-one to announce that it burned out, 10 to agree, 20
to come running in with new light bulbs and screw them
in, 9 to screw them in and leave the old bulb in, 10 to
ask for a videotape of the screwing, another one to come
in a few minutes later and notice the bulb went out
again and start the whole process all over again....
How many
Microsoft Visual C++ programmers
-- does it take to change a light bulb?
400. 1 to change the bulb, 50 to write a magazine about it, 50
to write a help file about it, 50 to code a little gadget so
when you hit the bulb it will announce all the names of the
team involved, 50 to go down to the drinks machine and get
everyone their can of coke, 50 to show off about how installing
a light bulb for Bill has made them paper millionaires, 1 to
answer the phone at the help desk ("Putting you through to our
light bulb expert sir....
