Related:

• The search for the perfect martini is a fraud. The perfect martini is a belt of gin from the bottle
  anything else is the decadent trappings of civilization. -- T.K....
• Never trust a base runner who's limping. Comes a base hit and you'll think he just got back from Lourdes.
  -- Joe Garagiola...
• Never, under any circumstances, be left alone with a cross-eyed nun with a bullwhip in one hand and a bottle of Gin in the other.
  .........
• Connoisseurs who like their martinis very dry suggest simply allowing a ray of sunlight to shine through a bottle of Noilly Prat before it hits the gin.
  -- Luis Bunuel...
• Recipe for a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster: (1) Take the juice from one bottle of Ol' Janx Spirit (2) Pour into it one measure of water from the seas of Santraginus V (Oh
  hose Santraginean fish!) (3) Allow 3 cubes of Arcturan Mega-gin to melt into the mixture (properly iced or the benzine is lost....
• Another gin and tonic, please.
• The bottle of water is now empty.