Homer: Five-alarm chili, eh?
Ned: Uh-huh.
Homer: [eats some] One, two... hey, what's the big idea?
Ned: Oh, I admit it. It's only two-alarm, two-and-a-half, tops. I
just wanted to be a big man in front of the kids.
Todd: Daddy? Are you going to jail?
Ned: We'll see, son. We'll see.
-- "El Viaje Misterioso de Nuestro Homer"