Related:

• Apu: Jiminy Cricket! Wooh, expired ham. [scribbles over the expiry date] Oh, this time I have gone to far.
  No, no one will fall for -- Homer: Woo hoo! Cheap meat!...
• Homer: Well, _that_ was a big bust. Is he _really_ the head of the Kwik-E-Mart?
  Apu: [growls, reaches towards Homer] Homer: No need to apologize, Apu...
• Homer: Marge, we're going to that restaurant. Marge
  But I think I'm allergic to seafood. The last time I ate shrimp, my throat closed up, and I went into convulsions....
• Waiter: [fried shrimp for Lisa] Here you go... \\ [pork chop \'a la // Hawaiian] There you are.
  .. \\ [a smaller serving of fried shrimp] For the baby....
• Inspector: Apu Nahasapeemapetilan, you have disgraced the Kwik-E-Mart Corporation.
  Apu: But, sir, I was only following standard procedure....
• Man 1: I need one 29-cent stamp. Apu: That's $1.
  85. Man 2: I'll have $2.00 worth of gas, please. Apu...
• Apu: You see, whether igloo hut, or lean-to, or a geodesic dome, There's no structure I have been to, which I'd rather call my home.
  When I first arrived, you were all such jerks, But now I've come to looooooove your quirks....
• Apu: {[holds out a towel] Good morning, sir!} Home
  {Aah!} Apu: {Relax, please. You do not have anything I have not seen before....
• Homer: Woo-hoo! A perfect day. Zero bears and one big fat hairy paycheck.
  [opens it up] Hey! How come my pay is so low?...