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• You can't depend on me all your lives. You have to learn that there's a little Homer Simpson in all of us.
  -- Homer Simpson Homer Defined...
• Homer: Dad, how come you never gave me any encouragement?
  Maybe I could have been something more than I am....
• Burns: You mean you're willing to give up a good job and a raise, just for your principles?
  Homer: Hmmmm, you put it that way it does sound a little far-fetched, but that's the lug your looking at....
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• Homer: Welcome to the Simpson residence or "casa de Simpson," as I call it.
  Grimes: Yeah, what did you want to see me about, Simpson?...
• You have to learn that there's a little Homer Simpson in all of us. -- Homer, "Homer's Odyssey
• Are you a parent? Do you sometimes find yourself unsure as to what to say in those awkward situations?
  Worry no more... When are you going to grow up?...
• Homer: I'm going to have to shut it down myself. Fat, don't fail me now!
  [jumps in car; tires blow out] D'oh!...
• Marge: But on the other hand, when you don't take advantage of an opportunity, you can end up regretting it for the rest of your life.
  Homer: You're right, Marge. Just like the time I could have met Mr....