Related:

• Attention all units!
  Riot in progress at (*click*) -- Chief Wiggum turns a deaf ear, "I Love Lisa...
• Brooks: [Yiddish voice] What's with the sir -- [normal voice] What's with the siren?
  Wiggum: Evening, Simpson. You got a short and your taillight started blinking when you made that turn....
• Umpire: Okay, let's go over the ground rules. You can't leave first until you chug a beer.
  Any man scoring has to chug a beer. You have to chug a beer at the top of all odd-numbered innings....
• Marge: [into microphone] Hello, police? This is Marge Simpson.
  My husband is on a murderous rampage. Over....
• Your boy picked a bad time to fall down a well. If he'd done it at the start of the fiscal year, no problemo.
  -- Chief Wiggum tells Marge it's all in the timing, "Radio Ba...
• Chief Wiggum: Well it's no secret. Our city is under siege by a graffiti vandal know as El Barto.
  Police artists have a composite sketch of the culprit....
• Wiggum: We need two cups of coffee, and two orders of bite-sized breakfast pancakes.
  With extra dipping sauce. Kid: Please pull up to the service window, please....
• Wiggum: Don't worry, folks, we'll find your wallet.
  Marge: Dogs! Chief, you're getting powdered sugar all over my floor....
• Homer: Aw, being a clown sucks. You get kicked by kids, bit by dogs, and admired by the elderly.
  Who am I clowning? I have no business being a clown!...