Access Media BBS

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DETERIORATA (With apologies to Desiderata) - GO PLACIDLY AMID THE NOISE & WASTE.
REMEMBER WHAT COMFORT THERE MAY BE IN OWNING A PIECE THEREOF....
DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE POLACK WHO: Spent four days in Sears looking for wheels for a miscarriage?
Took his expectant wife to the grocery store because they had free delivery?...
Subject: Real Programmers - Real Programmers don't eat quiche.
In Fact, real programmers can't even spell quiche....
Two girls were roommates. One evening, Millie came running in, shedding clothes on the way to the bathroom.
She yelled, "Hurry up Tillie, get ready for our date!" Tillie didn't know anything...
DEAR (Your Choice) I have been watching you very closely to see if you have been good this year, and if you are, I will have some special treats for you this year at XMAS.
I cannot promise you...
You know you're a redneck when people see your porch and think you're having a yard sale.
Soon after the Texas Aggie clocked in for work, the foreman called him over and told him that he had a phone call in the front office.
When the Aggie returned, he had a mournful expression on his f...
There was this frog on a lily pad, in the middle of a pond, surrounded by alligators.
He didn't want to be eaten but he couldn't think of a way to get to edge of the pond without being gobbled up....
This man walks in a bar and says to the bartender, "Hey Joe, how about fixing me up with 8 shots of whiskey and 8 bottles of beer?
Joe says, "Well hell, what's the matter?" The Man says, "Well...
The dare devil stunt woman had lost her balance. The psychiatrist was attempting to establish a friendly relationship to facilitate treatment.
"Tell me about your work," he said. "W...

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