16> Shaky camera work more an accident than an artistic choice.
15> "Remember the 80's?" becoming less of a rhetorical question
every year.
14> Newest VJ? Abe Vigoda
13> Tabitha Soren's latest "hot flashes" ain't from MTV News.
12> Anna Nicole Smith seen wandering around Kurt Loder's trailer.
11> Rap Artist of the Year: MC Dole
10> "The Grind" now consists of 70% waltzing and 30% people with
broken hips being carried off on stretchers.
9> On MTV "Unplugged", new host Jack Kervorkian decides each week
which aging rock star to remove from life support.
8> Signature MTV rocket no longer launches without 15 minutes of
manual manipulation.
7> "Singled Out" replaced by "Widowed Out."
6> "Real World - Miami Beach" -- Eight crotchety senior citizens
share a condominium.
5> Getting harder and harder to tell the difference between Martha
Quinn and Colin Quinn.
4> Tabitha Soren begins each report by resting her breasts on the
desk in front of her.
3> On tonight's "Road Rules:" Edwin drives the '72 Dodge wagon
too slow in the left hand lane taking the gang to the Early
Bird special at the local Hojos.
2> Newest All-Girl Alternative Band: Joan of AARP
and the Number 1 Sign that MTV is Getting Old...
1> "Oy! MTV Complains!"
This list copyright 1997 by Chris White and Ziff Davis, Inc.
The Top Five List top5@walrus.com http://www.topfive.com
New Movies Starring Christian Slater
15> "Biting Raoul"
14> "Dentl"
13> "Alien IV Going Back In"
12> "Belly Jack"
11> "Breakfast at Tiffany's Spleen"
10> "Edward Scissorteeth"
9> "Untasted Heart"
8> "Young Gums"
7> "The Three Mouthketeers" (with Marv Albert and Mike Tyson)
6> "Broken Arrow Shirt"
5> "My Dinner of Andre"
4> "The Story of a Man Who Went, Without Surgery, From An Being
an Outie to an Innie"
3> "Who's That Eating Gilbert Grape?...
