Top 10 disqualifiers for consideration of relational status:
10. Uses "party" as a verb.
9. Knows all the words to "Why Don't We Get Drunk and Screw?"
8. Considers "Whooooo!" a valid form of expressing approval
7. Thinks "quark plasma" is a party drink
6. Hair mass > brain mass
5. Thinks "electron transfer" is a new dance step popularized by the New
Kids on the Block
4. Thinks Dr. Spock has cute pointy ears
3. Has accepted more drinks than IQ, and still isn't drunk
2. Isn't expecting to go home tonight, but is hoping for a ride in the
morning
1. Needs pronounciation guide to read the television listings
Social Engagements
You stay by her side the entire party 0
You stay by her side for a while hen leave to chat
with a college drinking buddy -2
Named Tiffany -4
Tiffany is a dancer -6
Tiffany has implants -8
When mingling, you hold your mate's hand and gaze at her lovingly +1
When mingling, you introduce her as "the old ball and chain"
and pat her on the rump -5
When she points out a hot-looking woman and asks if you think
she's pretty, you say, "Yes, but nowhere near as pretty as you" +1
When she points to a woman and asks if you think she's pretty, you say,
"Yeah, but don't worry, she's lousy in bed" -6
That woman is her sister -90
You have one drink, and that's it 0
You have more than a few and perform the tango with a poodle....
