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Why doesn't Jesus eat M and M's? Cos they fall through his hands.
Whits pink, wrinkled and hangs oot yer trousers??? Yer Gran!
What are 3 words you never wanna hear whilst making love? Honey, I'm home!
What do you get when you cross ESP with PMS? A bitch who knows everything.
How do you save a man from drowning? Take yer foot of his head.
Q: How many men does it take to change a toilet roll? A: We don't know. Never happens.
Q: Why was the leper caught speeding? A: He couldn't take his foot of the accelerator.
Q: What do you get when you cross a computer with a whore? A: An f****ing know it all.
A chicken sandwidch walked into the bar, ordered some food and beer.
The bartender says: "Sorry, we don't serve food here"....
Why do farts smell? For benefit of the deaf.
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