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• A father, mother and son decide to go to the zoo one day.
  So they set off and are seeing lots of animals. Eventually they end up opposite the elephant house....
• A bright, well-behaved little boy lived with his parents and grandparents in suburbia.
  One evening, the boy's father passed outside his bedroom and was pleased to hear him kneeling beside his bed saying his prayers....
• Kids Say the Darndest Things (Young Wisdom - Out of the Mouths of Babes) A three-year-old went with his dad to see a litter of kittens.
  On returning home, he breathlessly informed his mother there were two boy kittens and two girl kittens....
• W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<&l
  < -if you have to ask get out of the way- Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while he was writing a ticket or giving you a warning, you got the feeling that he would just love to yank you out of the car, right through the window, and smash your face into the front fender?...
• Proof By Intimidation ----- -- ------------ A Horse has an infinite number of legs.
  A horse has two legs in back and forelegs in front....
• Mommy Mommy, Can I play with Grandma? Shut up kid, You've already dug her up 3 times today!
  Little Boy Blue, come blow your horn. The sheeps in the meadow, the cows in the corn....
• 100 Ways to Confuse Your Roommate 1. Insist that you are a vegetarian and protest anytime your roommate eats meat.
  Then leave "Slim Jim" wrappers on the floor and lie on the bed holding your stomach everytime your roommate walks in....
• Diary of a Snow Shoveler: December 8: 6:00 PM. It started to snow.
  The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our cocktails and sat for hours by the window watching the huge soft flakes drift down from heaven....
• When I was in a six person suite of rooms, one of my room mates was a witch, and by coincidence, another room mate had a key to his room.
  One night the witch room mate returned to find that all six calendars in his room were set to October, and there was a pentagram of pencils on his desk....