Related:

• Things you never hear people say: 'Hand me that Piano!'
• One Liners If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
  A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer....
• Dad's Words of Wisdom Don't ask me, ask your mother.
  Were you raised in a barn? Close the door. You didn't beat me....
• Things You Don't Want To Hear When Lying On The Operating Table
  "Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing my concentration off...
• why is a fire engine red ? ( in parts of the world that it is red ) the fire engine has six wheels and six crew members.
  six plus six is twelve. twelve inches makes a foot....
• Monty Python: - My dog's got no nose. - But how does it smell?
  - Awful. Atomic version: I say, I say, I live near Sellafield and my dog's got no nose, six legs, two heads, and it glows in the dark....
• You've got the whitest teeth I've ever come across.
  .... %end of list------------- Female to guy: Hi, you look like a real wanker....
• The ark lands after The Flood. Noah lets all the animals out.
  Says, "Go and multiply." Several months pass. Noah decides to check up on the animals....
• I Love Her, But... (a collection of men's thoughts on their women) .
  ..she has an uncanny way of standing between me and the television screen....