Related:

• I'll get a bunch of monkeys, dress 'em up, and make 'em reenact the Civil War!
  Heh, heh, heh! -- Homer Simpson Homer the Grea...
• Homer: Aren't parents supposed to encourage their kids whenever they show talent?
  Marge: But gambling is illegal! Homer: Oh, only in 48 states....
• Clerk: Yep, `General Sherman'. They say he's five hundred pounds of bottom-dwelling fury, don't you know.
  No one knows how old he is, but if you ask me (and most people do), he's hundred years if he's a day....
• Marge: Just between us girls, he hasn't been this frisky in years!
  Patty: [grunt] I don't want to think about it. Home...
• Heh heh heh.
• Homer: [gasps] It must be the first of the month: new billboard day!
  [a car-carrying truck stops behind him] [a bunch of cars drive onto it accidentally] Drive...
• Bart: Dad, remember when Tom had you in that headlock and you screamed "I'm a hemophiliac" and when he let you go, you kicked him in the back?
  Homer: Heh heh heh. Yeah. Bart: Could you teach me how to do that?...
• McClure: Thirty-five new shows to fill a few holes in their programming lineup.
  [presents a schedule chart that's actually more holes than lineup] That's a pretty daunting task -- and the producers weren't up to it....
• Homer: _That's_ what ballet is? [whining] Oh -- Marge
  You promised! You can't back out like when you volunteered for that Army experiment to avoid dinner at my sisters'....