Related:

• Hapablap: Bob is not here. We have searched every square inch of this base and all we have found is porno, porno, porno!
  Quimby: We have only twenty minutes left. Send in the esteemed representatives of television....
• Soldier: Ooh, sorry. We don't normally drive these in the Air Force.
  Wiggum: [cuffing Bob] Got ya, ha ha, you...TV-hating mutant!...
• Assistant: [on phone] Oh, here he comes. What is it now, Quimby?
  Quimby: Nothing, nothing. Only the, er, city has just passed another tax on puffy directing pants....
• Bart: [gasps] Sideshow Bob! [everyone gasps and screams] Bob
  [on TV] Hello, Springfield. Sorry to divert your attention from all the big noises and shiny things....
• Barlow: You know, there are three things we're never going to get rid of here in Springfield
  one, the bats in the public library -- [scene switch to man opening card catalog and screaming as bats fly out] -- two, Mrs....
• Hapablap: You know what really frosts my Kelvinator?
  That friutcup's probably still laughing at us from his damn hidey-hole....
• Guard: They're gone! Hapablap: Hell...not the Wright Brothers plane!
  The Smithsonian's gonna have my ass on a platter....
• Hapablap: What in the world according to Garp -- ? Those are my dress towels.
  [tries the locked door] Who's in my private washroom?...
• Singers: Without a Mayor Quimby, our town would really sink, [a garbage truck with a "Vote Quimby" ad empties a bin] We wouldn't have a tire yard, or a mid-size roller rink.
  [Quimby grins next to burning tires, then roller skates] We wouldn't have our gallows, or our shiny Bigfoot trap, [Quimby grins through noose, then smiles next to trap] It's not the mayor's fault that the stadium collapsed....