Related:

• Judge: Mr. Hutz, we've been in here for four hours.
  Do you have any evidence at all? Hutz: Well, your Honor, we've got plenty of hearsay and conjecture, those are _kinds_ of evidence....
• Lawyer: Krusty, have you _ever_ seen this so-called animation genius before?
  Krusty: Yes I have. Lawyer: [surprised] You have?...
• Bart: Keep the trial going, I'll be right back. Hutz
  Your Honor, I'd like to call all of my surprise witnesses again....
• Hutz: Are you saying, _under oath_ Mr. Myers, that your father didn't steal any of the characters associated with your studio?
  Myers: Well, I don't think I _am_ under oath, but....
• Hutz: All right, gentlemen, I'll take your case. But I'm going to have to ask for a thousand-dollar retainer.
  Bart: A thousand dollars? But your ad says "No money down"....
• Marge: I'm Marge Simpson, and I have an idea. Everyone
  Aw, no. Marge is going to say something. etc. Marge...
• Burns: Now before we begin, let me make one thing clear for you.
  I want your legal advice. I even pay for it. But to me you're all vipers!...
• Hutz: Good news, Bart: the Krusty O Cereal Corp. has settled your case for $
  100,000, less, of course, my legal fees. Bart: [suspicious] What kind of legal fees?...
• Naches (rhymes with Bach' us, with "Bach" pronounced like the composer) is what every Jewish parent wants from their children, lots of good returns, good grades, good spouse, good grandchildren.
  So, now that you all understand naches, the joke...