Related:

• Bobby: First, the award for the alumnus who gaied the most weight.
  Homer Simpson! Homer: Oh, my God! Bobby: How'd you do it, Homer?...
• Homer: Welcome to the Simpson residence or "casa de Simpson," as I call it.
  Grimes: Yeah, what did you want to see me about, Simpson?...
• I'd love to, but... I'm staying home to work on my cottage cheese sculpture.
  -- 7 of 101 Easy Ways To Say NO...
• Kent: Well, what do you say to the accusation that your group has been causing more crimes than it's been preventing?
  Homer: Oh, Kent, I'd be lying if I said my men weren't committing crimes....
• Bart: Please don't make me stay, dad. I'll do anything you say.
  I'll find religion! I'll be good sometimes!...
• Kent: Mr. Simpson, how do you respond to the charges that petty vandalism such as graffiti is down eighty percent, while heavy sack-beatings are up a shocking nine hundred percent?
  Homer: Aw, people can come up with statistics to prove anything, Kent....
• Look at me: I design coastlines. I got an award for Norway.
  Where's the sense in that? None that I've been able to make out....
• Krik: Oh, my demo tape! Homer: [Homer examines the tape] "Can I Borrow a Feeling?
  [laughing] "Can I Borrow a Feeling?" [continues laughing] That's your picture on the front....
• What can I say? I laughed. I cried. I fell down. It changed my life. The end.