The Simpsons

The Simpsons

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cheerfully] All right, this is dedicated to Bart Simpson, with the message, "I am coming to kill you slowly _and_ painfully.
-- Marty, the wacky radio DJ, "Cape Feare...
Scene shows Marge in the kitchen] Marge: [threateningly] Bart, I am going to _get_ you.
..[brandishes some scissors] Bart: [gasps] Marge...
Wiggum: I'd like to help you ma'am, but, heh heh, I'm afraid there's no law against mailing threatening letters.
Marge: [indignantly] I'm pretty sure there is. Wiggum: Hah! The day I take co...
Lisa: Bart, I figured it out! Who's someone you've been making irritating phone calls to for years?
Bart: Linda Lavin? Lisa: No, someone who _didn't_ deserve it. -- As long as it's cheaper th...
Bob: [narrating aloud] Dear "Life in these United States", a funny thing happened to me.
..uh...[faints] Snake: Use a pen, Sideshow Bob....
Bob: Take care, Snake. May the next time we meet be under more.
.. _felicitous_ circumstances. Snake: [not understanding] Guh?...
Wiggum: [miffed] Sideshow Bob has no decency. He called me "Chief Piggum!
[everyone laughs] Heh, now I get it....
Lawyer: Robert, if released, would you pose any threat to one Bart Simpson?
Bob: [barely in control] Bart Simpson? Ha!...
Lawyer: But what about that tattoo on your chest? Doesn't it say, "Die Bart, Die?
Bob: [conciliatorily] No, that's German for "The Bart, The....
Bart+Lisa: Aah! Sideshow Bob! Bart: _You_ wrote me those letters.
Marge: You awful man! Stay away from my son. Bob...

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