Three Texas Surgeons

Three Texas surgeons were playing golf together and discussing surgeries
they had performed.

One of them said, "I'm the best surgeon in Texas. A concert pianist lost 7
fingers in an accident, I re attached them, and 8 months later he
performed a private concert for the Queen of England."

One of the others said. "That's nothing. A young man lost both arms and
legs in an accident, I re attached them, and 2 years later he won a gold
medal in field events in the Olympics."

The third surgeon said, "You guys are amateurs. Several years ago a guy
who was high on cocaine and alcohol rode a horse head-on into a train
travailing 80 miles an hour. All I had left to work with was the horse's
ass and a cowboy hat. Now he's president of the United States."


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And another joke:

Four surgeons are discussing who has the best patients to operate on. The
first surgeon says, "I like to see accountants on my operating table because
when you open them up, everything inside is numbered."
The second responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside
them is color coded." The third surgeon says, "No, I really think librarians
are the best; everything inside them is in alphabetical order."

But the fourth surgeon shut them all up when he observed: "You're all wrong.
Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, no
balls, no brains and no spine, and the head and the ass are interchangeable
...