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I Think The Monkeys At The Zoo Should Have To Wear Sunglasses So They Can't Hypnotize You.
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I think the monkeys at the zoo should have to wear sunglasses so they can't
hypnotize you.
-- Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey
Related:
If they have moving sidewalks in the future, when you get on them, I think you should have to assume sort of a walking shape so as not to frighten the dogs.
-- Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey...
I think when you go on trial they should have a parrot there that says guilty or not guilty for you, as a sort of courtesy.
-- Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handey...
In weightlifting, I don't think sudden, uncontrolled urination should automatically disqualify you.
-- Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handey...
If you think a weakness can be turned into a strength, I hate to tell you this, but that's another weakness.
-- Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handey...
Whether they ever find life there or not, I think Jupiter should be considered an enemy planet.
-- Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handey...
Sometimes I think the so-called experts actually ARE experts. -- Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handey
Sometimes I think I'd be better off dead. No, wait.
Not me, you. -- Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handey...
If you're a horse, and someone gets on you, and falls off, and then gets right back on you, I think you should buck him off right away.
-- Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey...
I bet the sparrow looks at the parrot and thinks, yes, you can talk, but LISTEN TO YOURSELF!
-- Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handey...