Living on Earth is expensive, but it does include a free trip
around the sun.

Birthdays are good for you; the more you have, the longer
you live.

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom
door you're on.

Ever notice that the people who are late are often much
jollier than the people who have to wait for them?

If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy?

Most of us go to our grave with our music still inside of us.

If Wal-Mart is lowering prices every day, how come nothing
is free yet?

You may be only one person in the world, but you may also
be the world to one person.

Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.

Don't cry because it's over; smile because it happened.

We could learn a lot from crayons: some are sharp,
some are pretty, some are dull, some have weird names, and
all are different colors.... but they all have to learn to live in
the same box.

Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler.

A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery
on a detour.

Happiness comes through doors you didn't even know
you left open.