Miscellaneous Jokes

Miscellaneous Jokes

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He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever.
-- Old Chinese saying...
Monty Python "In accordance with our principles of free enterprise and healthy competition, I'm going to ask you two to fight to the death for it.
Ripping Yarns "Mind you, not as bad as the night Archie Pettigrew ate some sheep's testicles for a bet.
..God, that bloody sheep kicked him......
It's a hundred and six miles to Chicago, we've got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses.
"Hit it....
Pink Panther "Kato, what is going on in that little yellow brain of yours?
-- Chief Inspector Clouseau, in reference to a priceless white\ Steinway piano....
The Odd Couple "A penny for your thoughts?" "A dollar for your death.
The Princess Bride "Inconceivable!" "You use that word a lot.
I do not think it means what you think it does....
Daffy Duck "Ho! Ha-ha! Guard! Turn! Parry! Dodge!
Spin! Ha! Thrust!" --D. Duck "Consequences, shmonsequences!...

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