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I was in the grocery store. I saw a sign that said "pet supplies".
So I did. Then I went outside and saw a sign that said "compact cars". -- Stephen Wrigh...
In school, every period ends with a bell. Every sentence ends with a period.
Every crime ends with a sentence. -- Stephen Wrigh...
I xeroxed a mirror. Now I have an extra xerox machine. -- Stephen Wrigh
The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska.
Now Santa Claus is missing. -- Stephen Wrigh...
I had some eyeglasses. I was walking down the street when suddenly the prescription ran out.
-- Stephen Wrigh...
I got food poisoning today. I don't know when I'll use it. -- Stephen Wrigh
I put my air conditioner in backwards. It got cold outside.
The weatherman on TV was confused. "It was supposed to be hot today." -- Stephen Wrigh...
I was in the first submarine. Instead of a periscope, they had a kaleidoscope.
We're surrounded." -- Stephen Wrigh...
All the plants in my house are dead -- I shot them last night.
I was teasing them by watering them with ice cubes. -- Stephen Wrigh...
My girlfriend does her nails with white-out. When she's asleep, I go over there and write misspelled words on them.
-- Stephen Wrigh...
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