Miscellaneous Jokes

Miscellaneous Jokes

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A young married couple has difficulties conceiving a baby, so after a while the wife consults her doctor, who recommends the minor of 3 possible operations.
The operation is performed, but a month l...
A famous hypnotist was performing in a large auditorium full of people one night.
He began to speak in a soft and steady voice over the loud- speaker system....
A little withered old man walks into a timber company office, and applies for a job as a lumberjack.
The foreman politely tries to talk him out of the idea. After all, he is old, small, and appare...
This guy buys a parrot. Every morning he stands in front of the cage and asks in a pleasant voice "Can you talk?
This goes on for weeks with absolutely no response from the bird. Finally one mo...
Young Charlie is having trouble with his first grade addition homework, so his father decides to help.
He teaches the Charlie how to add small numbers by counting on his fingers. Eventually, the l...
They're making a new movie about Dan Quayle's military career.
It's going to be called "FULL DINNER JACKET" Did you hear about the Polock who studied five days for a urine test?...
GUEST: Do lemons have wings? HOST: What? GUEST: I said, do lemons have wings?
HOST: Of course not. GUEST: Oh my god, I think I just squeezed your canary into my drink!...
Q: Hear about the guy who complained to a friend that his wife had cut him down to twice a week.
A: The friend said, "Hell that's not so bad, I know two guys she's cut out entirely!...
I've got a joke that'll make you laugh 'til your tits fall off!
Oh... I see you've already heard it....
Q: What do you call someone who speaks two languages?
A: Bi-lingual. Q: What do you call someone who speaks three languages?...

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