Best Fortunes

Best Fortunes

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71: 69 with two fingers up your ass. -- George Carli
A bather whose clothing was strewed By breezes that left her quite nude, Saw a man come along And, unless I'm quite wrong, You expected this line to be lewd.
A beat schizophrenic said, "Me? I am not I, I'm a tree.
But another, more sane, Shouted, "I'm a Great Dane!" And covered his pants leg with pee....
A Christian is a man who feels repentance on Sunday for what he did on Saturday and is going to do on Monday.
-- Thomas Ybarra...
A conservative is a man who believes that nothing should be done for the first time.
-- Alfred E. Wiggam...
A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who has never learned to walk.
-- Franklin D. Roosevel...
A friend with weed is a friend indeed.
A hard man is good to find.
A man needs a mistress, just to break the monogamy.
A mathematician named Hall Has a hexahedronical ball, And the cube of its weight Times his pecker's, plus eight Is his phone number -- give him a call.
....

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