A drunk is driving through the city and his car is weaving violently
all over the road. A cop pulls him over and asks, Where have you been?

I've been to the pub, slurs the drunk.

Well, says the cop, it looks like you've had quite a few.

I did alright, the drunk says with a smile.

Did you know, says the cop, standing straight and folding his arms,
that a few intersections back, your wife fell out of your car?

Oh, thank heavens, sighs the drunk. For a minute there, I thought I'd
gone deaf.