Miscellaneous Jokes

Miscellaneous Jokes

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Marvin was the world's oldest virgin. After years and years of putting ads in singles' papers and enlisting in dating services, he was nearly penni- less.
In desperation, he went to a whorehouse. "L...
Some notes on friends: 1) You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your friend's nose!
2) You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can'...
A Scotsman was on a fishing trip in the northwoods of Canada.
What's that over yon'?" the Scotsman asked of his guide....
A man named Smith stopped by the doctor's office to see what the doc found wrong with Mrs.
Smith. The doctor told Mr. Smith that he had treated two Mrs....
Q: How do you make a dead baby float? A: Add a scoop of ice cream and some root beer.
The Mother Superior in the convent school was chatting with her young charges, and she asked them what they wanted to be when they grow up.
A twelve year old said, "I want to be a prostitute." The M...
Q: How do you double the price of a yugo? A: Fill up the gas tank.
The foreman at the sawmill wasn't eager to hire the blind man because of the obvious risks involved, but the guy begged for a chance.
You'll see," he said. "Just put me downstream of the saw and a...
Carpenter's Joke Did you hear about the house that the two lesbians built?
Not a single stud was used. It was all tounge and groove....
Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and an onion?
A: No one cries when you slice up a lawyer....

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