The Simpsons

My name isn't Krusty the Klown. It's Herschel Krustofsky.
My father was a rabbi. <His> father was a rabbi....
Man 1: Should I finish college? Rabbi K: Yes. No one is poor except he who lacks knowledge.
Woman: [babe in arms] Rabbi, should I have another child?...
Homer: Boy, you don't have to follow in my footsteps.
Bart: Don't worry, I don't even like using the bathroom after you....
Rabbi K: You know that my son Herschel was first in his yeshiva class?
As a matter of fact, he was voted `The most likely to hear God'....
Oy vey's mir! You have brought shame on our family!
Oh, if you were a musician or a jazz singer, this I could forgive....
Bart: Krusty, do you think about your father a lot?
Krusty: All the time. Except when I'm at the track....
Krusty: So, uh, Milhouse, know any knock-knock jokes?
Milhouse: [crying] I want to go home!...
Announcer: Academy Award Playhouse now returns you to.
.. Hercules vs. the Martians! Martian: Welcome to our spaceship, mighty Hercules....
Rabbi K: [answering the phone] Hello. Hello? Anybody there?
What's this, I hear the phone ring, and suddenly there's nothing....
Didn't Itchy Junior look happy playing with his father?
And didn't Scratchy Junior look happy playing with his dad until they got run over by a thresher?...

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