Miscellaneous Jokes

Miscellaneous Jokes

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with a kazoo band playing "Thus Spake Zarathustra" in the background.
..] "Thinking you were making an ordinary phone call, you have instead reached....
Hello, this is Dr. Pangloss. If this were the best of all possible worlds, I could come to the phone right now, but I can't, so if you could leave your name and number.
.....
Hello?" <pause for a few seconds> "Sorry, he's not here right now, but if you leave a message, he'll get back to you.
woman taped off a "phone sex" service) WOMAN : (seductively) Hi.
I'm Linda. You know, it can be really lonely when you're a fashion model....
Just after the earthquake a friend of mine put on his answering machine
"Hi, this is Jeff. We can't get to the phone right now because we were killed in the Earthquake....
Hello, I'm not hear right now. In fact, I'm out getting a new parakeet.
If you leave a message after the beep, I'll be sure to get back to you....
Ring...click....(sound of loud music in background).
..Hello? - just a second while I turn the stereo off (sound of person running to click off music, which gets quiet....
Hello, this is Jim.
Speak, worm!" Works best if done in a Darth Vader voice.
You know what to do at the tone."

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