Best Fortunes

Best Fortunes

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Hardly a pure science, history is closer to animal husbandry than it is to mathematics, in that it involves selective breeding.
The principal difference between the husbandryman and the historian i...
Having discovered the possibility that other creatures could be used for sexual intercourse, early man was likely to have made many such attempts .
.. though it is doubtful that he was so sexually ca...
He could be a poster child for retroactive birth control.
He hated to mend, so young Ned Called in a cute neighbor instead.
Her husband said, "Vi, When you stitched up his torn fly, Did you have to bite off the thread?...
He wasn't much of an actor, he wasn't much of a Governor -- Hell, they _H_A_D to make him President of the United States.
It's the only job he's qualified for! -- Michael Cai...
He who findeth sensuous pleasures in the bodies of lush, hot, pink damsels is not righteous, but he can have a lot more fun.
He who sneezes without a handkerchief takes matters into his own hands.
He's not pining, he's passed on! This parrot won't squawk!
He's ceased to be! He's expired, and gone to meet his maker!...
Her figure described a set of parabolas that could cause cardiac arrest in a yak.
-- Woody Alle...
Her kisses left something to be desired -- the rest of her.

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