The Simpsons

The Simpsons

Home › Fortune Cookies › The Simpsons

John: Oh, the color scheme and the rabbit ears! And the two point three children, I mean, where's the Hi-C?
Lisa: [walking in, holding a tray] Hi-C and fluffernutters! John: Oh! And pearls o...
John: Oh, I've got the exact same curtains, only in my bathroom.
Didn't you just die when you found these? Marge...
Homer: That John is the greatest guy in the world. We've gotta have him and his wife over for drinks sometime.
Marge: Hmm, I don't think he's married, Homer. Homer: Oh, a swinging bachelor, eh...
Homer: Ohmygod Ohmygod Ohmygod! Oh my god! I danced with a gay!
Marge, Lisa, promise me you won't tell anyone....
Marge: I'm very sorry you feel that way, because John invited us all out for a drive today, and we're going.
Homer: Woah-ho-ho, not me! And not because John's gay, but because he's a...
Homer: I'm not setting foot outside this house until _that_ man is gone!
Bart: Oh, Dad! You are the living end!...
Bart: Hey, where'd that cool creepy Santa come from?
John: Japan. Except over there they call him "Annual Gift Man" and he lives on the moon....
John: And that's where Kent Brockman was caught cheating in the Springfield marathon.
All: Ooh... [passing in front of a plumbing supplies store] Joh...
Bart: That was a killer tour, man! Lisa: I never realized how many celebrities humuliated themselves right in our backyard.
-- "Homer's Phobia...
Smithers: John! John: Uhh, oh, Waylon! I'd like you to meet the Simpsons!
Smithers: I know the Simpsons. [sotto voce] So this is your sick mother?...

< previous

337

338
339
340
341
342
343
344
345
346
654
next >