Toggle navigation
Collections
Fun
Jokes
Fortune
Photo
Nicknames
Blog
ﻮﺑﻻگ
Iran
The Simpsons
Home
›
Fortune Cookies
›
The Simpsons
Homer: You know, Marge, for the first time in our marriage I can finally look down my nose at you.
_You_ have a gambling problem! Marge: That's true. Will you forgive me? Homer: Oh, sure. Re...
Bart: Dad...we've been robbed! Lisa: Wake up, Dad, wake up!
There was a burglar and he took my saxophone!...
Bart: [upset] The burglar even took my stamp collection.
Lisa: _You_ had a stamp collection? [Homer, Marge, and Lisa laugh their heads off] [The phone ring...
Lisa: Bart's pain is funny, but mine isn't. That saxophone was my one creative outlet.
It was the only way I could truly express myself....
Flanders: Heidely-ho, neighborinos! Homer: Can't talk.
Robbed. Go hell. Flanders: Heh. You folks got robbed too?...
Lisa: {We _are_ insured, aren't we, Mom?} Marge: {Homer, tell your child what you bought when I sent you to town to get some insurance.
} Homer: {Curse you, magic beans!} Marge: {Oh, stop blami...
Homer: Hello, Police? Are you sitting down? Good!
I wish to report a robbery. Wiggum: [bored] A robbery, right....
Kent: When cat burglaries start, can mass murders be far behind?
This reporter isn't saying that the burglar is an inhuman monster like the Wolfman, but he very well could be....
Ladies and gentlemen, ladies and gentlemen -- please.
We have a major break in the case. We recovered the burglar's hankerchief from one of the crime scenes....
a laser hits Jasper in the eyes] Jasper: Oh!...my cataracts are gone.
I can see again! All the beauty of na -- [Another laser hits him in the eyes] I'm blind....
< previous
...
40
41
42
43
44
45
46
47
48
49
...
654
next >