The Simpsons

The Simpsons

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Man: I'm sorry, Mr. Burns, but I must object. This Simpson is not qualified!
[There are nods of agreement] Burns: I see....
Homer: Woo-hoo! I'm a college man! I won't need my high school diploma any more!
[sets fire to it and starts singing] I am so smart!...
Homer: My first day of college. I wish my father was alive to see this.
Abe: [springing up from the back seat] Hey! Home...
Homer: [yelling at a student] Neeeerd! Marge: Homer, that isn't very nice.
Homer: Marge, try to understand. There are two kinds of college stude...
Homer: [spiking the punch] Heh heh, I'll be a campus hero.
[Another student tastes the punch and spits it out] Stude...
Homer: Marge, someone squeezed all the life out of these kids.
And unless movies and TV have lied to me, it's a crusty, bitter old Dean!...
Prof: {Now if anyone would like to stay, I'm going to hold a comprehensive review session after every class.
} Homer: {[waving] Do we have to?} Prof: {No --} Homer: {Then kiss my curvy butt goo...
Marge: {Homer, we have a perfectly good bookcase.} Home
{Yeah, but this is what they're doing on campus. Besides, it isn't costing u...
Prof: This proton accelerator destabilizes the atom in this chamber here, then propels it -- Home
Uh, excuse me, Professor Brainiac, but I worked in a nuclear power plant for ten yea...
Dean: Homer, no one blames you for the accident, we simply feel you might benefit from outside tutoring.
I researched these names myself. [hands him a list] Homer: [to himself] Yeah, y...

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