The Simpsons

Troy: Hi, I'm Troy McClure. You might remember me from such telethons as "Out With Gout '88" and "Let's Save Tony Orlando's House.
Folks, do you realize without your support, public...
Troy: What the hell -- Oh! We got a call. Homer: Ha ha!
Some idiot actually called in. Troy: Hello? What's your name?...
Marge, it's public TV! They never have anything good.
Where are the Geraldos? Where are the Ewbankses-es?...
Marge: [of public TV] They need our support! Besides, they gave me two tickets to the ballet.
Homer: [jubilant] Ballet? Woo-hoo! Marge: [incredulous] You like ballet? Homer: Marjorie, _please...
Homer: _That's_ what ballet is? [whining] Oh -- Marge
You promised! You can't back out like when you volunteered for that Army experiment to avoid dinner at my sisters'....
Carl: Hey Homer, you wanna get a beer on the way home?
Homer: [sneering] I can't. I gotta take my wife to the ballet....
Homer reaches inside a pop machine, grunting] Home
Just...a little more...argh...got it! [realizing] Aah!...
Hello? Can I get some help? Snack-related mishap!
-- Homer with his arm stuck in a vending machine, "Marge on the Lam...
Thanks, Marge. When my husband left, he took all our power tools along with the car, my youth, my faith in mankind.
-- Ruth Powers on divorce, "Marge on the Lam...
Ruth: Vayachipa's loins ought to be outlawed. Marge
[snickers] Burns: Bah! Far too much dancing, not nearly enough prancing!...