Signs You Need A New Doctor

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Signs You Need A New Doctor

  • He calls you at two in the morning "just to talk."

  • Instead of rubber surgical gloves he wears oven mitts.

  • He keeps accidentally referring to himself as "the defendant."

  • After examining you, he says, "Now do me."

  • He thinks Eastern Medicine was developed in Long Island.

  • He keeps accidentally referring to your legs as "drumsticks."

  • His examination room is Room 201 at the No-Tell Motel.

  • He introduces you to his anesthesiologist, "Doctor Jim Beam."

  • Before surgery, he asks if you want this "to go."

  • He tries to color your X-rays with crayons.

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