Limericks

Limericks

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A widow who fancied a man some Was diddled three times in a hansome.
When she clamored for more Her young man became sore And exclaimed "My name's Simpson not Samson....
A worried young man from Stamboul Founds lots of red spots on his tool.
Said the doctor, a cynic, "Get out of my clinic; Just wipe off the lipstick, you fool!...
An architect fellow named Yoric Could, when feeling euphoric, Display for selection Three kinds of erection -- Corinthian, ionic, and doric.
He hated to mend, so young Ned Called in a cute neighbor instead.
Her husband said, "Vi, When you stitched up his torn fly, Did you have to bite off the thread?...
In the Garden of Eden sat Adam, Massaging the bust of his madam, He chuckled with mirth, For he knew that on earth, There were only two boobs and he had 'em.
Said a horny young girl from Milpitas, "My favorite sport is coitus.
But a fullback from State Made her period late, And now she has athlete's fetu...
Said a swinging young chick named Lyth Whose virtue was largely a myth, "Try as hard as I can, I can't find a man That it's fun to be virtuous with.
My back aches, my pussy is sore; I simply can't fuck any more
I'm covered with sweat, And you haven't come yet, And my God, it's a quarter to four!...
There once was a couple named Kelley, Who lived their life belly to belly.
Because in their haste They used Library Paste, Instead of Petroleum Jelly....
There once was a freshman named Lin, Whose tool was as thin as a pin, A virgin named Joan From a bible belt home, Said "This won't be much of a sin.

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