The Simpsons

The Simpsons

Home › Fortune Cookies › The Simpsons

Homer: Did you hear me? I said I quit, Monty! And since I quit, I can do anything I want.
Burns: Is that so? Homer: Ooh, lovely desk. It would be too bad if someone, oh, I don't know....
Homer: And that is that! Goodbye mind-numbing, back-breaking labor forever.
Hello, dream job in paradise....
Bart: You're a pin-monkey? Wow! Finally I don't have to be ashamed of my father's job.
Lisa...
cene shows Marge dressing up and Homer in a suit] Home
[voice-over] That night, your mother and I went out for a romantic evening to celebrate the start of our new life....
Homer: [sighs] I love you, Marge. Marge: I love you too, Homey.
Homer: Everything in our lives is finally perfectly balanced....
Lisa: So, Dad, were you excited that Mom was pregnant?
Homer: Actually, your mother hadn't told me. At that time I had no idea Maggie even existed....
Homer: So anywho, back then there was _no_ way for me to know your mother was pregnant.
Homer: [voice-over] The next few weeks at my dream job were like a wonderful waking coma.
Homer serves drinks to bowlers] Homer: [voice-over] I was in heaven.
If horseracing is the sport of kings, then surely bowling is a....
Hibbert: Congratulations, Mrs. Simpson: you're pregnant.
Marge: Mmm... Hibbert: Am I to take it that this is [chuckles] an unwanted pregnancy?...

< previous

127

128
129
130
131
132
133
134
135
136
654
next >