Miscellaneous Jokes

Miscellaneous Jokes

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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight....
How many Americans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
1) One. 2) Two. One to replace it and one to tell him it was burned out (in states that still have car-inspection laws....
How many Amish does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Amish don't have light bulbs. They bake pies....
How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb? All of them.
How many assholes does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. Assholes never see the light anyway....
How many astronomers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Astronomers prefer the dark.
How many auto mechanics does it take to screw in a light bulb?
1) Two. One to try to put in the wrong lamp, and one to replace the broken socket....
How many Ayatollahs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. There were no light bulbs in the 13th Century....
How many babysitters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. They don't make Pampers small enough....
How many Baltimore Orioles does it take to change a tire?
One. Unless it's a blowout, then the whole team shows up....

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