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Homer: They're ruining my whole life. Marge, please, this is where I need you the mo
I'm counting on you do to something or say something to make it all better....
Jones: We're aware of your problems, and, Mr. Simpson.
..we want to help. Homer: Mmm. I saw that report you did on Sasquatch....
Homer: Ehh, someone had to take the babysitter home.
Then I noticed she was sitting on the gummi Venus, so I grabbed it off her....
Homer: Hee hee! Here comes the bouncing ball of justice!
Jones: Tonight on "Rock Bottom", we go undercover at a sex farm for sex hookers....
Homer: Somebody had to take the babysitter home. Then I noticed she was sitting on [splice] her sweet [splice] can.
[splice] -- o I grab her -- [splice] sweet can. [splice] Oh, ju...
Homer: [fearfully] Marge? Kids? Everything's going to be just fine.
No go upstairs, and pack your bags...we're going to start a new life....
Marge: Look, maybe this whole thing will blow over.
[helicopters swoop over the house; news vans pull up] Home...
Newsman: Simpson scandal update: Homer sleeps nude in an oxygen tent which he believes gives him sexual powers.
Homer: Hey -- that's a half-truth! {[changes channels to Sally Jesse...
Announcer: Today on "Ben": mothers and runaway daughters reunited by their hatred of Homer Simpson.
And here's your host, Gentle Ben. [a bear wearing a helmet with a...
Announcer: And now we return to "Fox Night at the Movie
Homer S.: Portrait of an Ass-Grabber", starring Dennis Franz....
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