Toggle navigation
Collections
Fun
Jokes
Fortune
Photo
Nicknames
Blog
ﻮﺑﻻگ
Iran
The Simpsons
Home
›
Fortune Cookies
›
The Simpsons
Abe: Welcome home, Son. I broke two lamps and lost all your mail.
[Marge walks away] What's wrong with your wife?...
Homer: You're home safe. Done my duty. See you the next time we need your signature.
Abe: Aw, you never want to spend any time with me....
Homer opens the door resolutely, then unplugs the TV] [the kids, watching it, open their mouths] Home
[quickly] Kids! Here's $50, why not go to the movies, then take a cab to your a...
Marge: Here he is: Rex Harrison and Paul Anka rolled into one.
Ooh, hmm. That tonic really works -- you and Grampa should bottle it and go into business together....
Homer: Ooh, Mama! This is _finally_ really happening.
After years of disappointment with get-rich-quick schemes, I _know_ I'm gonna get Rich with _this_ scheme....
Homer: Sir! Uh, hello sir! Yes, you look like a man who needs help satisfying his wife.
So -- [man slugs him in the face] Ow!...
Frink: N-hey, I doubt very highly that one elixir could boast so many fantastic properties.
[drinks some; turns into a handsome man] [smooth voice] What say we am...
Mr. Van Houten: Tonight, we'll push the twin beds together.
..and I found something for Milhouse down at the mall, too...
Hibbert: {I've discovered that the rejuvenating effect people feel is actually a mild form of poisoning -- no doubt a result of the unsanitary conditions in Grampa Simpson's bathtub.
Milhouse: What's going on? Where are all the grown-ups?
Nelson: Who cares? With no adults, I _run_ this city....
< previous
...
117
118
119
120
121
122
123
124
125
126
...
654
next >