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This better be important, it's my wedding night. I'm trying to sleep!
-- Troy's views on wedding nights, "A Fish Called Selma...
Parker: Hey sleep is for has-beens, my friend, and you're about to have a very crowded schedule.
This marriage scam is paying off big time. Bartende...
Troy: Yeah, in a minute... darling. [hangs up] Well, she may be helping my career, but she's starting to cramp my style.
Parker: Oh, who cares, the offers are rolling in. Paramount wants you fo...
Parker: Okay, then get this: I think they want you to play McBain's sidekick in.
.. brace yourself, the new McBain movie! Troy: McBain's sidekick?...
Selma: [menacing] Is this a sham marriage? Troy: Sure baby, is that a problemo?
-- Fair enough, "A Fish Called Selma...
Selma: You _married_ me just to help you carreer? Troy
You make it sound so sordid, look: don't we have a good time together?...
Selma: But... don't you love me? Troy: Sure I do! Like I love Fresca.
Isn't that enough? The only difference between our marriage and any one else's i...
Selma: Are you gay? Troy: Gay? I wish! If I were gay they'd be no problem!
Troy: Sure, you'll be a sham wife, but you'll be the envy of every other sham wife in town!
-- Wow, what a bargain!, "A Fish Called Selma...
Troy: One day, my lady Selma's gonna have a star right next to mine, so watch out.
.. Laszlo Panaflex. -- That's some tough competition, "A Fish Called Selma...

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