The Simpsons

The Simpsons

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Lisa: No, no, they're wrong! The creature they seek is the walking undead!
Nosferatu! Das Wampyr! [Family looks blankly] [exasperated] A vampire!...
Brockman: In a completely unrelated story, Montgomery Burns has just closed a deal to buy the Springfield Blood Bank.
Burns: [blood on his cheek] Ooh, I'm very excited about this deal. ...
Homer: It sure was nice of Mr. Burns to invite us to a midnight dinner at his country house in.
.. Pennsylvania! Lisa: Aw, there's something fishy about this whole setup. Marge: Lisa...
Burns: [over the intercom] Welcome, come in. Ah, fresh victims for my ever-growing army of the undead -- Smithe
Sir, you have to let go of that button. Burns: Well, son of a bitch -- ...
Burns: Well, if it isn't my good friends, the, er -- Smithe
Simpson family, master. Burns: Simpson, eh? Excellent....
Lisa: [sotto voce] Dad, do you notice anything strange?
Homer: [sotto voce] Yeah, his hairdo looks so queer -- Bu...
Homer: Ooh, punch! Lisa: [sniffs it] Ew! Dad, this is blood!
Homer: Correction -- _free_ blood....
Lisa: [motioning to the coffins] Satisfied? Bart: Big deal.
It's no different from the basement in Grandpa's rest home....
Bart: [strangled] Shee, ba-ba-ba-ba -- Lisa: Please, Bart, I've seen your stupid Shemp.
Bart: Gna-gna-gna-gna -- Lisa: Yeah, I've seen your Curly too!...
Lisa: [breathlessly] Mom, Dad: Mr. Burns is a vampire, and he has Bart!
Burns: Why, Bart is right here. Bart: [droning] Hello, Mother....

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