Priceline.com's stock soared and eBay created an entire new section on their online auction site to accommodate the US Congress' overhaul of campaign financial law.

Senator John McCain, in a speech from Capitol Hill, praised his fellow Senators's choice to "name your own price" for Congressional influence. "This is significant legislation that will turn around a stagnant economy by pouring millions into politicians' pockets."

In the new law, private citizens will be able to log onto Priceline.com and "name their own price" to influence a member of the House. Citizens wishing to purchase a Senator need to logon to Ebay.

William Jefferson Clinton has replaced William Shatner as spokesman for the new Congressional Priceline. In an "off-camera" remark, as Mr. Clinton held his crotch, he said, "This is going to be *big*, really *big*."