Holiday Diet Tips

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Holiday Diet Tips

HOLIDAY DIET TIPS
If no one sees you eat it, it has no calories.

If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, they cancel each other out.

When eating with someone else,
calories don't count if you both eat the same amount.

Foods used for medicinal purposes have no calories.
This includes any chocolate used for energy, brandy,
Sara Lee Cheesecake (eaten whole), and Haagen-Daz Ice Cream.

Cookie pieces contain no calories because the process of breakage
causes calorie leakage.

If you eat the food off someone else's plate, it doesn't count.

If you eat standing up the calories all go to your feet
and get walked off.

Food eaten at Christmas parties has no calories, courtesy of Santa.

STRESSED is just DESSERTS spelled backward.

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  589. [page] Women Rule
  590. [page] Women Are Bright Because
  591. [page] WordPerfect Helpline
  592. [page] Work Phrases
  593. [page] World S Shortest Books
  594. [page] Worms And Alcohol
  595. [page] Worst Analogies
  596. [page] Worst Country Songs
  597. [page] Y0K And Y1K Problems
  598. [page] Yo Mama So Stupid (and Ugly)
  599. [page] You Know You Re Getting Old When
  600. [page] You Know You Re An Idiot When
  601. [page] You Might Be A Yankee If
  602. [page] You Might Be From Lousiville If
  603. [page] You Might Have A Redneck Yard If
  604. [page] You Might Be A Redneck If
  605. [page] You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If
  606. [page] You Re Lost In The Generation Gap Between Baby Boomers And Generation X If
  607. [page] Yummy Fingers