Many of you have heard Pat Robertson, Jerry Falwell,
and others speak of the "Homosexual Agenda," but no
one has ever seen a copy of it. Here is a copy
obtained directly from Homosexual Headquarters.

The Homosexual Agenda

6 a.m. Gym
8 a.m. Breakfast (oatmeal and eggwhites)
9 a.m. Hair appointment
10 a.m. Shopping (Macy's or Nordstrom)
12 p.m. Brunch
2 p.m. (1) Assume complete control of U.S. Federal,
state, and local governments, as well as all
the other national governments
(2) Destroy all healthy marriages
(3)Replace all school counselors in grades
K-12 with militant homosexuals who seek to
recruit children for the homosexual lifestyle
(4) Bulldoze all houses of worship
(5) Sieze control of internet and all other
media
(6) Be utterly fabulous
3 p.m. Beauty rest to prevent facial wrinkles from
the stresses of world conquest, followed by
aroma therapy
4 p.m. Cocktails
6 p.m. Light dinner (soup, salad with arugula &
balsamic vinegar dressing, Chardonnay)
8 p.m. Theater
10 p.m. Cocktails in a charming neighborhood bistro
12 a.m. Bed (du jour)