Marrying into a Jewish Family
Disadvantage - Your Christmas tree decorations will gather dust in
their boxes.
Advantage - You won't have to vacuum up dry pine needles and clog
the vacuum cleaner.
Disadvantage - You'll need to keep a straight face when someone
orders a Virgin Margarita.
Advantage - Your spouse won't die of cirrhosis.
Disadvantage - You'll have to sell your archery set.
Advantage - You won't shoot an arrow into your neighbor's cat (or
is that a disadvantage?).
Disadvantage - You'll never have a family member who can fix your
car.
Advantage - You won't have to look at tatoos.
Disadvantage - No one in the family will have 5 beers with you when
the Yankees win the pennant.
Advantage - There will always be plenty of sweaters in the house.
Disadvantage - Used clothing stores will not be the first choice when
seeking birthday presents for your nephews or nieces.
Advantage - No one will give your son or daughter an ant farm.
Disadvantage - Heavy cream will be a thing of the past.
Advantage - You won't have to specify "diet" when you ask for a
soda in a family member's house.
Disadvantage - You won't have to color Easter eggs.
Advantage - After awhile, you will learn how to pronounce "Challah"
without anyone laughing at you.